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Saturday, August 1, 2009
Attention All Actors, Techies, Directors, Stage Managers, and Choreographers
There is this awesome website called cafepress.com. And on this awesome website there are a bunch of shirts and bags with funny stuff on them. Amongst all this funny stuff is a whole section of theater jokes just for nerds like us. Need a good laugh or some funny apparel? Go here: http://shop.cafepress.com/theater
Friday, July 31, 2009
What I've Learned So Far From College Shopping
1) Shopping with my mother is like shopping with a 5 year old. I’ll be walking around the store, looking for things I’ll need, and then I see something. Then I’ll turn around and ask, “Hey Mom, what do you think of…” and damn! She’s dissappeared! Where did my middle-aged, may-as-well-be-senile mother go? I start retracing my steps and there she is, at the other end of the store, looking at shiny things (i.e. silverware, plates, makeup mirrors, etc). So, after a while I could only walk five steps at a time so that I could make sure my mom was keeping up and not looking at something colorful.
2) Bed, Bath & Beyond is SCARY. Oh, wait, I’m sorry, that’s an understatement. It’s REALLY FREAKIN’ SCARY. The aisles are barely wide enough for your shopping cart, so you have to leave it behind while you’re looking for cheep towels, hoping that when you come back that someone hasn’t taken all the shit you spent an hour looking for. Then, there’s so much stuff in that place that they need skyscrapers for shelves (and, for a short person like myself, it’s easy to be intimidated when you’re surrounded by shelves five times your size…). Oh, and did I fail to mention those people who don’t care that the carts are too big for the aisles? Yeah, those people are really scary. If you end up walking through the same aisle they’re in, then get ready to either get the fuck out of the way or else you will be pushed to the side (I’m sorry, not pushed, SHOVED to the side). I never want to have to go in there again… :’(
2) Bed, Bath & Beyond is SCARY. Oh, wait, I’m sorry, that’s an understatement. It’s REALLY FREAKIN’ SCARY. The aisles are barely wide enough for your shopping cart, so you have to leave it behind while you’re looking for cheep towels, hoping that when you come back that someone hasn’t taken all the shit you spent an hour looking for. Then, there’s so much stuff in that place that they need skyscrapers for shelves (and, for a short person like myself, it’s easy to be intimidated when you’re surrounded by shelves five times your size…). Oh, and did I fail to mention those people who don’t care that the carts are too big for the aisles? Yeah, those people are really scary. If you end up walking through the same aisle they’re in, then get ready to either get the fuck out of the way or else you will be pushed to the side (I’m sorry, not pushed, SHOVED to the side). I never want to have to go in there again… :’(
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Off-Broadway, What The Hell Are You Doing?
Last night I was talking with an old friend of mine, and she was telling me about this new show her cousin's in. So I asked "What show is it?"
"Oh, it's awesome! It's I Can Has Cheezburger: The MusicLOL!"
...you don't seriously mean they made a musical out of the lolcats website...do you?
Yes, ladies and gentleman, off-Broadway is digging its self into a deeper hole of epic failure and putting up a show about a kitty in search of a cheeseburger. I'm not kidding, here are some links:
http://icanhascheezburgerthemusiclol.wordpress.com/
http://www.fringenycdata.com/basic_page.php?ltr=I
Now, for all I know this show could be amazing (we'll see August 15th when I go see it). But, based on the synopsis, it just looks silly. And it upsets me because it's silly shows like this that make off and off-off Broadway look silly. Granted, there are some off and off-off Broadway productions that are really decent (i.e. Brown Ambition, the revival of Jaques Brel Is Alive And Well In Paris, Spring Awakening before it became popular, etc). But no one can deny that off-Broadway is slowly dying. Sure, we could blame the film industry for allowing people to see films for cheeper, but that doesn't excuse today's playwrights and directors for writing silly stuff like Lolcats the Musical. I understand that people are desperate to revive the dying horse that is theater, but unoriginal, uncreative shows don't help.
HOLY SHIT IT'S REAL!!! AAAHHHHH
I'm going to go cry in a corner now...
"Oh, it's awesome! It's I Can Has Cheezburger: The MusicLOL!"
...you don't seriously mean they made a musical out of the lolcats website...do you?
Yes, ladies and gentleman, off-Broadway is digging its self into a deeper hole of epic failure and putting up a show about a kitty in search of a cheeseburger. I'm not kidding, here are some links:
http://icanhascheezburgerthemusiclol.wordpress.com/
http://www.fringenycdata.com/basic_page.php?ltr=I
Now, for all I know this show could be amazing (we'll see August 15th when I go see it). But, based on the synopsis, it just looks silly. And it upsets me because it's silly shows like this that make off and off-off Broadway look silly. Granted, there are some off and off-off Broadway productions that are really decent (i.e. Brown Ambition, the revival of Jaques Brel Is Alive And Well In Paris, Spring Awakening before it became popular, etc). But no one can deny that off-Broadway is slowly dying. Sure, we could blame the film industry for allowing people to see films for cheeper, but that doesn't excuse today's playwrights and directors for writing silly stuff like Lolcats the Musical. I understand that people are desperate to revive the dying horse that is theater, but unoriginal, uncreative shows don't help.
HOLY SHIT IT'S REAL!!! AAAHHHHHI'm going to go cry in a corner now...
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Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Ode To the Onion
Oh onion, you are absolutely hysterical, making jokes about macintosh...
Apple Introduces Revolutionary New Laptop With No Keyboard
Nothing's easier than a wheel....
Apple Introduces Revolutionary New Laptop With No Keyboard
Nothing's easier than a wheel....
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Childhood Reminders
Ok, so I was on my facebook, and I noticed that a friend of mine had posted something about Fantasia. Remember that movie? Well, just so you know, I used to be OBSESSED with Fantasia. So, when I saw this picture on her profile...
I FREAKED OUT. I was all OH MY GOD! I REMEMBER THOSE FANTASIA MUSHROOMS THAT LOOK LIKE STEREOTYPICAL ASIAN PEOPLE! (They seriously do, though, don't they?) Then I thought, damn, I totally fell in love with a movie that was probably made by a bunch of racist people...well DUH the creaters were racist! I mean, who else other than an anti-semetic (a.k.a. WALT DISNEY) would have the guts to make an asian dance with mushrooms...HAHAHHAHAH. Sorry, that totally just made me think of how psychadellic that sounds. I mean, come on, an asian dance, with SHROOMS. Oh I can just imagine what the artist was doing when he was making this scene...
I FREAKED OUT. I was all OH MY GOD! I REMEMBER THOSE FANTASIA MUSHROOMS THAT LOOK LIKE STEREOTYPICAL ASIAN PEOPLE! (They seriously do, though, don't they?) Then I thought, damn, I totally fell in love with a movie that was probably made by a bunch of racist people...well DUH the creaters were racist! I mean, who else other than an anti-semetic (a.k.a. WALT DISNEY) would have the guts to make an asian dance with mushrooms...HAHAHHAHAH. Sorry, that totally just made me think of how psychadellic that sounds. I mean, come on, an asian dance, with SHROOMS. Oh I can just imagine what the artist was doing when he was making this scene...
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Monday, July 27, 2009
Woke Up, Got Out of Bed
Dragged a comb across my head
I walked downstairs and saw the cleaners
I said "oh shit" and put on some pants
And that's all I have to say
'Bout when I woke at twelve today...
And I don't know what inspired me to screw up Beatle lyrics to talk about my "morning", but it seemed like an awesome idea at the time. Especially since my day just started two hours ago and I know I'm going to be doing nothing today, again. So I figured why not try to write when I'm half awake, right? Oh, wait, sorry, that's the technique I use to write really weird poetry. This doesn't work so well with prose as I'll start to ramble and the problem with rambling is that you create run-on sentences and the problem with run-on sentences is that they're really freakin' annoying and DAMMIT SARAH WTF ARE YOU DOING?!
...aaaaaand I'm a freak. K BYE!
I walked downstairs and saw the cleaners
I said "oh shit" and put on some pants
And that's all I have to say
'Bout when I woke at twelve today...
And I don't know what inspired me to screw up Beatle lyrics to talk about my "morning", but it seemed like an awesome idea at the time. Especially since my day just started two hours ago and I know I'm going to be doing nothing today, again. So I figured why not try to write when I'm half awake, right? Oh, wait, sorry, that's the technique I use to write really weird poetry. This doesn't work so well with prose as I'll start to ramble and the problem with rambling is that you create run-on sentences and the problem with run-on sentences is that they're really freakin' annoying and DAMMIT SARAH WTF ARE YOU DOING?!
...aaaaaand I'm a freak. K BYE!
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Ok, I'm Serious This Time
I will try really hard to keep this updated. I had some success on tumblr.com (another cool blogging site that I let fall through), so I know I can get some readers on here (please?).
Anyway, despite the fact that I'm unemployed (stupid f***king economy), I have been busy the past few weeks. I helped my theater company put up a show in Manhattan at the East to Edinburgh festival. Here's the link if you don't believe me: http://easttoedinburgh.com/2009/midsummer.html
And yeah, it really was as corny as the title sounds (A Midsummer Night's Dream A Rock Musical?!?!?!?! wtf?). But it was fun hanging out with old friends and meeting people.
I also met the funniest woman on the planet - Carolyn Castiglia. She did the one-woman show "Brown Ambition", and it was hysterical. I mean, most one person shows are like autobiographies (egotistical catalysts for an artist to rant and rave about themselves). But this was honest, gutsy, and just plain hysterical. So, Carolyn, rest assured that the next time you're performing in NYC, I'm going to be there and drag a million friends with me.
And that's been life so far. Now I'm just chilling at home, bored, and making a list of what I need to bring with me to college. Oh yeah! Did I forget to mention that I'm finally going to college?! *cough**cough* YAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Ok, I'm done being obnoxious. See ya later imaginary followers!
Anyway, despite the fact that I'm unemployed (stupid f***king economy), I have been busy the past few weeks. I helped my theater company put up a show in Manhattan at the East to Edinburgh festival. Here's the link if you don't believe me: http://easttoedinburgh.com/2009/midsummer.html
And yeah, it really was as corny as the title sounds (A Midsummer Night's Dream A Rock Musical?!?!?!?! wtf?). But it was fun hanging out with old friends and meeting people.
I also met the funniest woman on the planet - Carolyn Castiglia. She did the one-woman show "Brown Ambition", and it was hysterical. I mean, most one person shows are like autobiographies (egotistical catalysts for an artist to rant and rave about themselves). But this was honest, gutsy, and just plain hysterical. So, Carolyn, rest assured that the next time you're performing in NYC, I'm going to be there and drag a million friends with me.
And that's been life so far. Now I'm just chilling at home, bored, and making a list of what I need to bring with me to college. Oh yeah! Did I forget to mention that I'm finally going to college?! *cough**cough* YAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Ok, I'm done being obnoxious. See ya later imaginary followers!
Sunday, May 24, 2009
My Love Affair With Sinfest.com
Whenever I feel down, I can always just browse through that website and I immediately have a smile on my face. It's just that perfect combination of hysterical and adorable. If you need an emotional pick me up (and you're like me and don't own a pet), go to www.sinfest.com. I guarantee smiles (if it fails, I'll make up for it by posting a video of me doing something ridiculous).
Saturday, May 23, 2009
How College Admissions Actually Works
I’ve come to the conclusion that admissions officers pick students via the enie-minie-miney-moe game.
How did I come to this conclusion? Well, this has basically been my college admissions experience this year. Some colleges I put a lot of effort into. Either I sent emails to teachers/admissions officers or I made sure my theater audition was freakin’ awesome. I even did this for one of my “safeties”, because they have a really kick-ass theater program. Other colleges I put very little, if any, effort into. Either I never made any correspondance what so ever, or I didn’t have to audition.
Well, here’s what happened. The schools I put the most effort into flat out rejected me. The schools I put a decent or little amount of effort into put me on their wait list (including that dumb safety). The schools I put absolutely no effort into not only accepted me but dumped a crapload of money into my lap.
Ok, so maybe admissions officers don’t play enie-meenie-miny-moe, but whatever they do lacks order and common sense. Seriously people, what gives? And if you or a friend are an admissions officer, I don’t mean to insult you or anything. But, how in the world does this make any sense?
Seriously
I need to keep with this more often. I don't know why, though, since no one reads it :( But, hey, I'm certainly not going to get any following if I don't post anything. With more free time on my hands, this should start kicking up again (hopefully, if I actually follow through this time).
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